The top 29 signs your partner is cheating on you
1. They hide their location on Snapchat or other social media
Yeah sure, some people don’t share this anyways for privacy reasons. But if they used to share it, and now suddenly for no reason their location is off-limits, that’s a red flag. Maybe they got a part-time job selling handguns to schoolchildren, but maybe it’s something else.
2. They accuse you of cheating
People accuse others of doing something because they know it's possible. If they can do it, you can do it. Always be warry of someone that accuses you of cheating. They might just be trying to justify to their own behavior. “I’m a cheating hoe, so I bet she is too. Otherwise, that just makes me a bad person.”
3. They try to start fights over nothing
People that cheat on you have a low-key desire to break-up. They just don’t have the courage to do it themselves. They want you to break up with them. So, they start a lot of fights and act like a moron until you say, “You know what, this isn’t working.”
4. They never leave their phone around you
If they're always bringing it into the bathroom, even when they're showering, they might be afraid you'll go through it. Ask them to use their phone for a minute. Are they standing over your shoulder making sure you aren't looking at texts? That's not a great sign. If you want to be sneaky about this, wait until you see them texting someone. If they refuse to hand over the phone while their mid-conversation, it might be because they don’t want you to see who they’re talking to.
5. Their texting habits change
Remember when they used to send you cute photos, or talk to you about their day? It’s possible they’re doing that with someone else now. It’s tough to maintain that level of intimacy with more than one person. If they’re not talking to you about random stuff, then they could be talking to someone else.
6. If you find a different brand of condom
Most people stick with a certain type/brand. If they suddenly pull out a random single different one, then someone else might have given them that. This is especially telling if you’re a man and you find a strange condom in your wife’s jeans when you’re doing the laundry after she was out last night drinking with her “sorority friends.”
7. They can't keep a story straight
The truth is easy to remember. Lies are much harder. If you suspect they might be lying about a story, ask them to repeat it a few weeks later. Did any major details change?
8. They take a lot of phone calls outside the house
Does your partner sit in the car for a few minutes each night when they get home? Do they go on walks without you and spend the entire time talking to someone else? Yeah, they could be talking to their weird uncle from Bangladesh, but maybe they’re talking their new beau.
9. They ask you to help take new profile photos
Lots of photos. Too many photos for a new headshot on Facebook. Cheaters are sociopaths and have no problems getting you to help replace yourself. If they’re asking you to take a lot of fun and interesting action photos, they could be looking to set up a new online dating profile.
10. They buy a new wardrobe and step-up the personal grooming
Did your partner go from shaving every few days and wearing sweatpants to a daily shave and a nice suit? Maybe they’re just getting their life together, or maybe they’re dressing to impress someone. (Does not apply if they just got a new job obviously, lol.)
11. They’re uninterested in being intimate with you
Have you been trying to initiate an encounters in the bedroom and they’re constantly turning you down? They might be getting it somewhere else.
12. They give you an STI
This is a very serious red flag. Sexually transmitted infections don’t just come from nowhere. They didn’t get it from a toilet seat. They had sex with someone else and didn’t use protection. Run for the hills.
13. They’re suddenly spending lots of money at bars and restaurants
Is your partner usually conservative with their spending habits? If you notice a change, then it might mean they’re going on dates without you. If they’re fine going out for dinner with their “friends” but not you, then you should probably just move on anyway because that’s lame.
14. They question you who hang out with
Cheaters often project their own bad behavior on others. When you say you’re going out with friends, do they accuse you of mislabeling the relationship? This is a person could possibly be doing this to you.
15. They stop taking photos of you two together
Happy couples take photos and selfies together. Happy couples like to have memories of their adventures. If your partner is suddenly uninterested in making memories with you, it could be because they don’t want to make their new partner jealous.
16. They stop posting your adventures on social media
Sure, not everyone uses Facebook, but most people have something. Snapchat, Instagram, etc. People who love their partners have no problem posting cute photos of you together doing something fun. If that behavior suddenly changes to sexy photos of them alone, they might be trying to impress someone.
17. They start complaining about your physical appearance
If someone is cheating, then it’s often because their new partner is more attractive/younger. If your partner starts negging on your looks out of nowhere, this is a bad sign. It’s also a crappy thing to do to your loved ones. Consider dumping them anyway. You’re beautiful.
18. They start asking you to do things in the bedroom they know you’re uncomfortable with
Cheaters want to break up with you, but they have a hard time doing it. So they try to create wedges in the relationship. One of these wedges can be sex-related. If they know you’re uncomfortable with something, and they try to get you to do it anyway, it can start a fight. Cheaters love fights because it gives them an excuse to cheat more.
19. They add your attractive friends on social media
But for some reason they don’t add the unattractive ones. Did your partner suddenly start following your sexy friends? Did they start messaging them late at night? Sending them selfies? This is not a good sign. They might be looking to upgrade you.
20. They go off the radar for hours at a time
You know when you’re dating someone, you kind of always know where they are and what they’re doing? Well now something has changed. Your partner is vague about their whereabouts and doesn’t respond to your texts and calls for hours. If it’s a one-time thing maybe they’re shopping for an important gift for, but if it’s all the time now, then it’s time to call Sherlock Holmes.
21. They start going to the gym again every day
Yes, fitness is important. But is your partner already sort of in shape? Do they work a long and demanding job that leaves them exhausted every day after work? Then going to the gym all the time now can be fishy. If they’re normally content to relax with you on the couch, but now they’re obsessed with their physical appearance you might want to ask them what’s up.
22. They start comparing you to other people in a negative light
Partners should be supportive. They shouldn’t be saying how much nicer Shawna’s butt is than yours’. If they’re saying things like, “You’d be hot too if you went to the gym as much as Dan,” then it’s time to re-evaluate the relationship. Beauty is only skin deep, kids. Don’t swing it around like a hammer.
23. They start drinking more or get stoned a lot
People who feel guilty, as well as people who are unhappy with their lives will often turn to substance abuse. If your partner is struggling and self-medicating, then you need to find out what’s wrong ASAP. They might just be depressed with their job, but they might also be seeing someone else and feel guilty about it. Get to the bottom of this. For both your sakes.
24. They don’t want to leave together from a party
Parties are a great place to meet people and/or hook up. If your partner wants to stay while you head home early, it might be because they have their eyes on someone else. They can’t flirt too much while you’re around, so they have to wait until you leave. If it’s a special circumstance like their birthday and you have to work early, that’s different. What you’re looking for is a repeat pattern of behavior. If you’re fine staying out until 1am, and they always want to stay out until 3am now, you might have a problem.
25. They never had a password on their before, but they do now
In the past, was your partner’s phone routinely unlocked at home? Did they not care when you used it Google something because your phone was out of reach? If they have a password now and they didn’t used to, that could be a bad sign. They might not want you seeing their notifications, or who they’re communicating with. Locking your phone is a good idea for security purposes. Again, what you’re looking for is sudden and unexplained behavior.
26. Their friends start ignoring you or being unfriendly
Are your partner’s friends not responding to your messages? Did they stop including you on invites to events and parties? They might have the inside scoop on your relationship. They might know that you’re going to be replaced soon. People always tell their friends different things than their partners. It’s easier to vent to someone you’re not sleeping with. That’s why people have therapists. They’re less judgy, more helpy. Friends can act as surrogate therapists but their advice to your partner might be, “Yeah you should break up and date the hottie.”
27. They start going to lots of events with someone else but insist they’re just friends
If your partner has rationally only hung out with someone once in a blue moon, but now is always around them, something might be up. Coffee can be just coffee but going to a see a romantic comedy movie is a different thing. We don’t usually spend time and money on things we don’t like.
28. They start talking about someone else a lot
Are they saying nice or flattering things about another person? Could this person potentially be a partner? Are they comparing you to them? This could be a bad sign. Although your partner might be suffering from the “grass is always greener on the other side” fallacy. Remind them that everyone has their faults and nobody is perfect. If your partner is idolizing someone else, then might have love goggles on.
29. They stop wearing the jewelry or clothing you gave them
Did you buy your partner a nice locket, bracelet, or anything else they normally wear all the time? Did they recently stop wearing it when they go out with “friends?” This could be a sign they feel guilty or are trying to hide that they’re in a relationship. You don’t want to be going on dates with a heart necklace or a locket with a picture of your partner in it.
In the end, the only way you’ll know for sure if your partner is cheating is if they tell you or you catch them. These signs are just tools that help establish a pattern. If all your partner does is lock their phone one day they’re probably not cheating. You shouldn’t be worried about every little thing. That’s not healthy. But if your partner start checking multiple items on this list and they’re getting distant then you should try to have a conversation.
When confronted, some cheaters will break down and confess what’s going on. Unless you’re a psychopath, cheating causes guilt which is uncomfortable to live with. They might just admit it.
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